Getting Instead of Having

This Christmas season was a little overwhelming if I were to be perfectly honest. Like every year I still get a little wistful on Christmas Day knowing the magic like Cinderella will vanish at the stroke of midnight; yet, I feel a sigh of relief. Our household is finally healed after six weeks of sickness. No one was spared and it was the lingering kind of bug that didn't leave as swiftly as it came on. Unlike Cinderella there was no fairy godmother with her magic wand that could get us in tip-top shape for the festivities. For our annual Christmas breakfast of “Happy Birthday, Jesus” cinnamon buns, I traded my apron for Pillsbury as a kitchen shortcut. Advent calendars never did happen and Christmas cookies will be baked- in January. Christmas was a simpler affair and perhaps appropriately so. When I recall the first Noêl aside from the star, it’s about as humble as it gets.

I was reminded again of a reoccurring lesson that life tends to teach me. I actually wrote about this seven years ago here. There is a paradigm shift in perspective when we switch from the obligatory “I have to” mentality to one of blessing when replaced with “I get to.” Time to fold laundry? I get to fold laundry because we have clothes on on backs. Ugh.. what to cook? My children have never known what it is like to go without a meal or wondering when their next meal will be. I have to clear snow off my windshield? Winter is beautiful and I have a vehicle to get from point A to point B. Cramming for a project? I have the luxury to pursue a career I love in this season of life. Over this holiday season I was reminded again of the immense privilege it is to be busy in this way. Eleven years ago Christmas Eve looked very different suffering a second miscarriage. To rub salt in my very raw and wounded heart, it was extra painful as I knew I could have had a six week-old baby in my arms had I not lost my first. A house full of squeals of laughter, childlike wonder and delight and yes, even squabbles is a dream come true and such a gift. With this in mind, tonight I played a quick game of Uno with my eldest, cradled my middle child with affection and spent quality time with my girl installing tinsel hair extensions [they aren’t great but she loves them!].

*Note I am referring to everyday normal occurrences* Toxic positivity gaslights and traumatizes people as it invalidates their very valid pain and I hope that isn’t misinterpreted here. My personal challenge is to reframe the mundane and unavoidable boring things so I no longer waste mental energy and drain myself from a constant taxing drip of grumbling and bemoaning. I want small potatoes to stay that way and not stew and brew into a damn three-course meal.

This powerful truth that the reason for the season: Emanuel [meaning “God with us”] came in the form of a heaven-sent babe to play the pivotal part in our Gospel redemption story which consequently flips the metaphorical tables in my mind. With God’s help, I have the power to neutralize my thoughts so I can focus on the things that matter most [Romans 12:2]. Life isn’t always easy, but our outlook can sure colour how we experience it.