Becoming
“For me, becoming isn’t about arriving somewhere or achieving a certain aim. I see it instead as forward motion, a means of evolving, a way to reach continuously toward a better self. The journey doesn’t end.
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Recently, I watched Michelle Obama’s documentary. I’ve been meaning to read her book, but as my local library is currently closed due to Covid-19, I’m currently reading a stack of books I own. Anyways, Michelle has been someone I have always admired. She exudes intelligence, class, poise, warmth and empathy yet; she has a strength and unapologetic fierceness to her. From all outward appearances, she seems to be a supportive wife and loving mother. Is it obvious I stan?
It was fascinating to hear her story. She grew up in a time when there was still an amplified undercurrent of racism in the south side of Chicago. Michelle shares how her high school guidance counsellor commented how she wasn’t “Princeton material” even though her grades were excellent and older brother was attending that same Ivy-league institution. Undeterred, Michelle was determined to go to Princeton. She did… and then proceeded to go to Harvard Law.
“Whether you come from a council estate or a country estate, your success will be determined by your own confidence and fortitude.”
On several occasions in the film, she conducts Q&A’s where young women would ask her questions like, “How do you respond when people treat you as if you were invisible?” Her response, “I never saw myself as invisible.” She didn’t let the bleak or underwhelming expectations of others or the status quo define her.
“You should never view your challenges as a disadvantage. Instead, it’s important for you to understand that your experience facing and overcoming adversity is actually one of your biggest advantages.”
Lately, I’ve been thinking about my career once my kids are all in school. In a little over two years, I’ll be re-entering academia and the workforce after a long motherhood break. I’m excited yet also completely terrified at the idea of failing. I’ve wanted to pursue interior design for years, but I often doubt my abilities, my “hire-ability” [will they want someone trendier, younger than me]? I look down on myself for being just a housewife. Do I have what it takes? Will I like it?
“Failure is a feeling long before it becomes an actual result. It’s vulnerability that breeds with self-doubt and then is escalated, often deliberately, by fear.”
I’ve come to the realization that I should just go for it and stop getting in my own way. There are so many unknowns, but I will find my way. Knowing I have 35+ years to work is motivation enough for me to work hard so I can do something I am passionate about while making a difference for my family.
“Success isn’t about how your life looks to others. It’s about how it feels to you. We realized that being successful isn’t about being impressive, it’s about being inspired. That’s what it means to be true to yourself.”
